What’s in a name!

Sanjay Dutt has stated in an interview that girls who retain their maiden surnames after marriage insult their husbands. He also questioned their commitment to the matrimonial home. The immediate provocation for this statement, of course, was the adverse comment made by his sister, Priya Dutt, a Congress MP over his joining the Samajwadi Party. Though Sanjay pleaded that his relationship with his sister remained in tact and there was no feud in the family despite reservations about his new wife, Manyata, yet his statement would surely ruffle feathers. A question will be tossed at him to explain why only girls are obliged to change not just their surnames but often even their first names in deference to the wishes of their husbands or their families. This happens when, for instance, the first letters of those tying the knot do not earn the approbation of the astrologers and the solution lies in giving a new name to the bride to be. Girls marrying outside their religion too end up with names commonly used in the religion of their grooms. It is strange that the girl child faces a gender bias right from the first day of her life. While the parents of a baby boy are felicitated, those producing a girl earn sympathetic comments. If your second child is a female and follows a male child, the usual comment is that your family is now complete implying that a female only plays a complimentary role.

The Indian society has been trying to rid itself of gender biases over some time. This has partly happened due to more and more girls acquiring professional education and becoming economically independent. They have often outshone boys as the results of school leaving examinations reveal. Though glass ceilings still exist, yet they have made significant inroads into traditional male bastions. The challenge posed by the new Indian girl, who asserts her individuality and independence creates shockwaves in society. The male-centric society, in turn, faults them for conduct at variance with traditions and culture. Girls are targeted before marriage for refusing the male advances and afterwards for not showing enough respect to the matrimonial home and its occupants. Sanjay Dutt’s comments, though provoked by his personal differences with his sister, fit into this slot. He has done a great disservice to the cause of empowerment of women while settling a personal score with Priya Dutt.

There is a dishonourable exception to the practice of only girls being made to change their names. Married men who are not sure about getting a divorce and wishing to marry the second time willingly embrace Islam and assume a new (sur) name. But in Sanjay’s case, it was Manyata who was marrying outside her religion. Besides, when you are marrying a celebrity like Sanjay, what’s truly in a name?